As you may or may not know, I’m a huge fan of DailyOM. Their daily emails always seem to come at the right time. Below is a DailyOM I received last week in my inbox that I keep coming back to, titled “Relying on others: The wisdom of surrender”. It’s so meant for me – I’m telling you, it’s like DailyOM knows exactly what I need to hear and when!
Lately I’ve been having a hard time “letting go”, you could say. I’m trying to be OK with a messy house and letting others do things for me. Dishes can sit in the sink for a couple days, right? Dirty diapers can pile up — laundry can go unfolded — for a bit? I feel most normal when my house is clean, but for now, normal is to let things go and maybe rely on someone else for a change, and not myself. To smell my baby’s head some more instead of vacuum up dog hair. To let others help – including Rob {when he has the energy to}! No entertaining. No added expectations. No guilt.
Here is the full DailyOM excerpt for “Relying on others” — perhaps it will speak to you as well!
Most of us pride ourselves on our self-sufficiency. We like to be responsible for taking care of ourselves and pulling our own weight in the world. This is why it can be so challenging when we find ourselves in a situation in which we have to rely on someone else. This can happen as the result of an illness or an injury, or even in the case of a positive change, such as the arrival of a newborn. At times like these, it is essential that we let go of our feeling that we should be able to do it all by ourselves and accept the help of others.
The first step is accepting the situation fully as it is. Too often we make things worse either by trying to do more than we should or by lapsing into feelings of uselessness. In both cases we run the risk of actually prolonging our dependency. In addition, we miss a valuable opportunity to practice acceptance and humility. The ego resists what is, so when we move into acceptance we move into the deeper realm of the soul. In needing others and allowing them to help us, we experience the full realization that we are not on our own in the world. While this may bring up feelings of vulnerability, a deep feeling of gratitude may also emerge as we open to the experience of being helped. This realization can enable us to be wiser in our service of others when we are called upon to help.
It takes wisdom and strength to surrender to our own helplessness and to accept that we, just like every other human being, have limitations. The gifts of surrender are numerous. We discover humility, gratitude, and a deepening understanding of the human experience that enables us to be that much more compassionate and surrendered in the world.
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